PAINTINGS & DRAWINGS

January, 2023

DISSOCIATION

The artwork is a complex depiction of assorted body parts arranged in a seemingly random and disjointed manner. The resulting figure has an eerie and unsettling quality, resembling a childlike form, yet deviating significantly from any typical human anatomy. The piece is intended to symbolize the tumultuous and chaotic mental state that many people encounter during their adolescent years. It serves as a representation of the time when societal expectations regarding success, beauty, and happiness felt like a compulsory personal pursuit, despite not aligning with one's true aspirations. Moreover, the artwork depicts a figure that lacks any clear definition or purpose, mirroring the disorientation and aimlessness that one often experiences during the transition to adulthood. It highlights the struggle to find personal values and goals amidst the external pressures faced by individuals during this period of their lives.

Matryoshka doll 

The artwork I created is a representation of my personal journey to discover my true identity during my teenage years. The centerpiece of the painting is a matryoshka doll, which serves as a symbol for the various aspects of my personality that often left me feeling confused and frustrated. The doll's expression is one of bewilderment, with a noticeable hole in its heart. Within the doll, there are many faces, each representing a different dimension of my identity. Some of these faces depict my ethical, moral, and altruistic side, where I strive to help others and be kind. However, there are also faces that reflect my negative traits, such as jealousy, meanness, and dishonesty. Despite the challenges I faced during adolescence, I now recognize that all of these aspects make up who I am today. Looking back, I see that my journey of self-discovery has allowed me to appreciate and understand the complexities of my identity. The painting serves as a reminder that each part of me is essential in shaping my identity and that I should embrace them all.

CHESSBOARD

This painting depicts a chessboard embellished with chess pieces bearing human faces while a larger face from above oversees their movements. Each chess piece conveys a range of emotions, such as stoicism, surprise, fear, anxiety, and resignation, which are manifested as negative expressions. It reflects my inner self, characterized by a keen awareness of external judgment. Like the chess pieces without agency, I, too, once felt profoundly influenced by society's expectations and the opinions of those around me. Similar to these chess pieces, I often found myself unable to move in the direction I truly desired. On a broader scale, these chess pieces embody a poignant portrait of modern individuals who lead mechanical lives in pursuit of society's predefined benchmarks of happiness. Like the looming black shadows behind the chess pieces, this painting evokes the prevailing sense of melancholy experienced by contemporary individuals ensnared by external expectations.

TURBULENCE
These paintings depict the intense emotional struggle that I faced when entering adulthood. They capture a mixture of confusion, guilt, and anxiety that I experienced while navigating new experiences. The first piece contrasts the symbols of childhood innocence - toys and nostalgic albums - with adult indulgences such as alcohol and cigarettes. This juxtaposition not only illustrates the shift from the safety of childhood to the unpredictable world of adulthood but also evokes a complex array of emotions. Similarly, the second painting portrays a person whose surroundings are distorted, which emphasizes the anxiety that is keeping the person from falling asleep. Inner peace is key to a good night's sleep, and when I'm feeling anxious, my surroundings can seem chaotic, much like the painting. There are times when I become nervous about trivial things, but there are also instances when my worries about the future or relationships keep me up all night. This piece captures the emotions I experienced during those restless nights.
UTOPIA
In this video, I aimed to bring to light the concept of inner peace. The video begins with a woman appearing on the screen, with her eyes closed, portraying the ideal world that exists in my mind. The picture is adorned with the sight of beautiful fins swimming along the waterfall and delicate flowers swaying in the gentle breeze. The painting is further beautified by the clouds, which are scattered throughout it, creating a dreamy atmosphere. At the bottom of the painting, lotus flowers bloom, which symbolize the essence of inner peace and tranquility. The woman appearing in this video represents my inner self, and through her, I illustrate how I have transformed into a person who looks within and takes care of myself. The painting is a reflection of my inner peace when I am mentally healthy and when I tend to my well-being with the utmost care.
The sketches I have created are a visual representation of my observations and experiences in life. Each sketch reflects a particular moment in my life, capturing the emotions and sensations I felt during that time. The first sketch depicts my initial encounter with Seoul, a new city that I had just moved into. As I sat down to draw, I was surrounded by unfamiliar sights and sounds, which left me feeling lonely, surreal, and uncomfortable. Using only a pencil, I attempted to convey the cold, desolate atmosphere of the place by restricting myself to black and white shades. Similarly, the second sketch portrays objects that I don't typically carry with me, such as a skull model, flowers, and shoes. These items symbolize a new, unknown world that I find myself in, where I feel lost and isolated. Once again, I used black-and-white contrast to represent the stark differences between the known and the unknown. Overall, both sketches capture the essence of my experiences, offering a glimpse into my innermost thoughts and emotions.
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